Wednesday, 13 July 2011

A new horizon....kinda...

Hey there...

Well, yesterday I had an appointment with my psychiatrist.  I actually felt okay that day, kind of like my usual self, but with the volume turned up to 20, lol.  So, we went through the motions of a normal consultation.  I told him I have had some bad days, but mostly, I am okay.  He's always very interested in my physical health issues, so we discussed the tracheal transplants that have been taking place all over the world.  I mentioned my frustration that they are still delaying it here.  Then he said something that referenced a Shakespeare quote.  He told me that he wishes to increase my lithium to 800mg a day, and asked what I thought.  I replied 'as you like it...'.  It took him a couple of seconds to process, and then he looked up and started to laugh.  He had a lovely laugh; it starts in the eyes, and spreads outwards.  It truly is pretty contagious, and I started to laugh too.  Only I then got seized completely by laughter, and couldn't stop.  Back and forth it went, and eventually I managed to stop.  But I must say, this won't have helped me in my struggle to appear sane.

Anyway, I had, as per usual, been up all night.  So having got my stressful appointment out of the way, I went home and snoozed for a few hours.  I was woken my the phone ringing, and it was a guy calling to tell me that I have been shortlisted for a research asst job I applied for, and I have a lovely interview on Tuesday.  I would love this job.  It's interesting and varied, I would get a chance to use my degree and challenge myself to achieve new things.  And basically, I would be paid quite handsomly for doing something I love.  Which is all that anyone wants from life, isn't it?

My airway is being difficult.  I have had this annoying chest infection, that has been lingering for quite some time.  It's awful, it's basically a whole lot of mucous that has settled into the sacs of my lungs and gone very thick and gluey.  It takes a combination of chest percussion, medication, and nebulisers to loosen it up.  And still it isn't coming easy.  This is one of those days when I find myself chained to the nebuliser.  Normally, I would be feeling very distressed, very upset.  But probably as a result of the increased lithium, I just feel somehow blank.  The emotions are in there, so my brain tells me, but they are struggling to overcome the giant chemical barrier that the lithium creates.

Speaking of lithium, yet again, my blood level is point 33.  Ooooops....hehehe

Have a lovely day, my friends, and be safe.

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